Emotions are positive or negative feelings that are associated with thoughts, behavioral responses, pleasure, and displeasure amongst other things.
Anger on the other hand is an intense emotional state which involves an unyielding response to a perceived hurt, provocation, or threat.
Emotions play a vital role in your reactions. It’s a feeling that helps with activities like decision making, day-to-day activities, and even relationships. What’ll be the fate of a relationship with no emotions?
Anger is a normal feeling, and at a point in time, everyone has gotten angry due to one thing or the other. It’s humane, but the ability to take control of that anger is what makes us more human.
Emotional and anger control is important for helping you avoid saying or doing something you might regret later. Before they get out of control, there are some strategies to control emotions and anger, and that’s why in this post, we’ll be taking you on a journey on how to control emotions and anger.
#1. Look at the impact of your emotions: It’s perfectly normal for emotions to be overwhelming at times or on certain occasions. If your emotions make you happy, it’s fine, but if it’s otherwise, you need to sit back and have a rethink.
More importantly, you need to strive to attain emotional stability such that you will be able to stay and live happy regardless of how you feel. If your joy must be stable, you cannot live at the mercy of your emotions. Emotions are often unstable, you cannot live at their mercy.
#2. Figure out when to express yourself: There’s a time and place for everything, and that includes emotions too. You can’t shout at a boss that pays your salary even if he upsets you, but you can cry or scream when you’re hurt by a loved one.
#3. Accept all your emotions: Do not try so hard to get so better at managing your emotions, because sometimes, there’s nothing you can do except to let it flow. Accepting your emotions as they come helps you to get more comfortable with them and also helps you to have certain control over them. It also allows you to feel them fully without having to react in extreme ways.
#4. Recognize what you’re feeling: Know what it is you’re feeling. You should be able to tell when you’re feeling disappointed, confused, furious, and even when you’re in love. It tells a lot about your mood and can help you gain control over your emotions.
- How To Control Anger In A Relationship
- How To Control Your Temper In A Relationship
- How To Deal With Anger In A Relationship
- How To Control Anger Outbursts
- How To Control Anger Immediately
- How To Control Anger And Sadness
- How To Avoid Anger In Relationship
- How To Manage Anger In A Relationship
- How To Control Boyfriend Anger
- How To Manage Anger In Marriage
- How To Control Sudden Bursts Of Anger
- Anger Management Therapy Techniques
- #Final Notes:
How To Control Anger In A Relationship
How spouses control their anger in a relationship can either make or mar their relationship. It is a known fact that every relationship has its ups and downs, but anger in a relationship can make things worse.
Luckily, there are ways you can control your anger in a relationship and work things out with your partner without doing it the hard way.
Read the tips below to learn how to control anger in a relationship.
#5. Take a deep breath when you’re angry: Breathing in and out helps to slow down your heart rate which can help reduce some of the symptoms of extreme anger.
#6. Take a step back from the situation: Talk a walk outside or go to a different room to calm down. Ask your partner to let you have a few minutes to yourself. This allows you to calm down without allowing your emotions to cloud your judgment.
#7. Forgive your partner: Forgiveness doesn’t have to mean that you agreed to what has happened, it just means that you’re willing to let go and that you’re choosing your relationship over that anger at that moment. Besides, holding on to that anger will only hurt you both in the end.
#8. Be patient and compassionate: Try to be patient with your partner when you’re angry. It might just be one misunderstanding. Be compassionate towards your partner too. It helps to calm your anger.
How To Control Your Temper In A Relationship
One of the most challenging things to do in a relationship is keeping your temper in check. So how do you control your temper in a relationship?
Uncontrolled temper can take a toll on your health and relationship if proper attention is not given to it.
So, are you ready to get your temper under control? Start by considering these tips on how to control your temper in a relationship.
#9. Think before speaking: Take a few moments to think before saying anything, to avoid regrets later, because, in the heat of the moment, it’s very easy for you to say something you might regret later.
#10. Release the tension using humor: Humor can lighten up the mood and calm you. Use humor to help you with what’s making you angry and release the tension.
#11. See your thoughts and emotions as a perspective: Always remember that your and your partner’s opinion won’t tally all the time, you’re after all two different people with different experiences. This will help to ease your temper.
#12. Listen to your partner: Do not turn a deaf ear to the other side of the story as there are always two sides to a coin. Listening to your partner helps you to maintain a stable temper.
How To Deal With Anger In A Relationship
We all get angry with our partners at a particular point in time, it’s unavoidable. Even life is not a bed of roses. A relationship is not a smooth ride either.
Do you have a hard time controlling your anger in your relationship? You should try the following tips on how to deal with anger in a relationship!
Helpful resource: Putting your feelings under control
#13. Communicate with your partner: Talk to your partner about what got you angry and fix it. Communication is key in every relationship.
#14. Talk without raising your voice: Yes, you’re angry at the moment, but shouting in anger at your partner will not make things any better. Resist the urge to shout at your partner when you’re angry.
#15. Address anger issues immediately: When you notice signs of anger in your partner, ask him/her what’s happening because leaving an angry person with their hurt makes things worse and not better.
#16. Talk about your concerns about anger with a relationship counselor: Seeking help from a specialist allows for sound emotional growth and also opens you to essential advice to manage your emotions to encourage a healthier relationship.
How To Control Anger Outbursts
For a lot of people, anger outbursts serve a purpose. Some try things like yelling at people or partners to get things done, and even though this method can help you meet your demands, the words spewed in the heat of the moment might cause lasting damage to your relationship, which I want to believe you don’t want to see happen.
It can be overwhelming at times, for you to deal with your anger outbursts and even your partner. But there are ways to deal with anger outbursts when you find yourself in difficult situations. Below are some tips on how to control emotions and anger outbursts.
#17. Recognize warning signs: If you can tell when you’re starting to feel angry, and it can help save a lot of commotion and drama in your relationship.
Some warning signs are: pounding heart, anxiety, high pitched voice, sweating, pounding heart, etc
#18. Talk to someone you trust: Talking to someone you trust can lift the weight off your shoulders and calm your mind too.
#19. Take some time to do something you enjoy: Do something that makes you happy. Whether it’s reading a book, listening to particular music, or even taking a walk in a park.
#20. Get help if need be: If you’re having issues controlling your anger, you might need to seek professional help before things get worse.
How To Control Anger Immediately
Anger is completely normal, but when it gets out of control, it can become destructive and can make you feel like you’re at the mercy of strong and unpredictable emotions.
Research has shown that anger can be a result of family background or past experiences. Most people who get angered easily probably have a history of disruptive or chaotic emotions or families.
The tips below will help you learn how to control emotions and anger immediately.
#21. Quickly visualize a relaxing experience: Try to remember a relaxing experience from your memory, and you can visualize from your imaginations too.
#22. Remind yourself that getting angry won’t fix anything: This would help you feel better and calmer instead of bursting out in anger.
#23. Do not jump to conclusions: When you’re in a heated argument with your partner, do not jump to conclusions, because they can be very inaccurate. Slow down and think carefully about your responses.
#24. Don’t dwell on the incident: Do not keep having flashbacks of what made you angry.
How To Control Anger And Sadness
Sadness lasts longer than many other emotions, and people tend to dwell in the emotion. When anger is now involved, it becomes a stronger emotion and a serious issue.
To be able to overcome this issue, below are helpful tips on how to control anger and sadness.
#25. Cry it out: Crying is a coping mechanism and it helps to communicate pain to others and also encourages others to show support. It can also have a relaxing effect and prevent anger outbursts.
#26. Smile often: Smiling when you’re sad and angry can help you feel better. Even if you don’t feel like it, it may help you feel positive.
#27. Take a warm bath or shower: Taking a warm bath will help you relax and can help soothe your feelings of sadness and anger.
#28. Harbour positive thoughts: Having positive thoughts will reduce the occurrence of sadness or anger
Helpful resource: affectionate greeting for your lover in the afternoon
How To Avoid Anger In Relationship
Everyone tends to get angry, especially in a relationship. The intensity of one’s anger can range from a simple annoyance to extreme rage.
Your response when you’re angry matters a lot, but it’s best to try and avoid it to avoid regrets later on. Hence, a few tips on how to avoid anger in a relationship.
#29. Step away from annoying situations: When you feel like you’re starting to get annoyed, step away from that scenario and get fresh air to avoid getting angry.
#30. Say something nice to yourself: Say things like ‘it’s okay, you can do this or ‘calm down’ to avoid anger outbursts at that time.
#31. Think about something funny: One of the ways to avoid anger is to think of something funny. Probably a comedy show you watched, or something that happened and made you laugh so hard. It’ll help you let go of the anger.
#32. Think of potential solutions before responding: This is where you give yourself time to manage your anger, and ask yourself what you can do to make the situation better instead of just throwing a fit.
How To Manage Anger In A Relationship
Do you unexpectedly lose your cool and wonder why? Do you get angry over the littlest of things? Are there days when you feel like you just woke up angry?
Well, it could be normal on some days and not normal on other days, so to help you keep the balance, we put together beautiful tips on how to manage anger in a relationship.
#33. Write down your thoughts and emotions: You write down in a journal, a personal, space on your social media, as a poem, or even as a song lyrics. Writing down your thoughts and feelings can help to improve how you feel.
#34. You can draw too: If you have a flair for drawing, scribbling, or sketching your thoughts or feelings can help lift your mood.
#35. Practice Meditation: Meditation creates mental clarity and awareness. It can help improve a person’s mental well-being. It also helps you to relax and calm your nerves too.
#36. Consider the consequences of your actions beforehand: This is where you think about what is likely to result from you getting angry. Ask yourself and think about what can happen if you are to flare up.
How To Control Boyfriend Anger
Is your boyfriend angry at you? Have you been wondering what you can do to make things better? Are you afraid of saying things so matters won’t escalate?
Or does his anger cause him to do or say hurtful and mean things? Worry not, because this guide is here to help as it’s about how to control boyfriend anger.
Helpful resource: Loving your spouse unconditionally
#37. Find out why he’s angry: If you don’t know what the issue is, you won’t be able to get a solution.
#38. Give him the space and time he needs: Your boyfriend might just need some time to cool off or calm down. If this is the case, respect that and don’t push too hard so he won’t do something you both would regret.
#39. Apologize to him: It’s always a good idea to apologize when you’re wrong. It’s the right thing to do. When you’re in the wrong, own up to it and apologize.
#40. Offer emotional support: Let him know that you know he’s angry and you understand. This kind of reaction can help to calm him a bit.
#41. Explain your side of things: In a relationship, oftentimes, disagreement just happens, and most of the time, it’s as a result of misunderstandings. Let your boyfriend know your point of view on the matter he’s angry about especially if he misunderstood you or is angry over something that isn’t true.
#42. Don’t raise your voice: Do not yell at him. He might do the same right back at you. And it won’t get you both anywhere, because you’ll both just be yelling and angry.
#43. Listen to his side of the story: Listen to him attentively and don’t interrupt when he’s trying to explain things. Offer a relevant response when he’s done.
#44. Show him you care about him and love him too: Every person is different and handles discord in different ways too. You should know what works with your man. Showing him you love and care about him might just do the trick. You can get his favorite food, snack or drink and you can wear his favorite dress of you too.
#45. Cook for him: The best way to a man’s heart is his stomach is already a popular saying. You can cook for him his favorite meal or a new recipe you just learned and let him know he’s the first person to taste that recipe from you.
#46. Compliment him: Women are not the only ones who love compliments. Tell him how handsome he is when he’s angry at you or how his outfit is perfectly made for him. That way, he won’t be able to avoid you but smile instead at your compliments.
Helpful resource: sweet things that pacify his anger
#47. Surprise him a little: Write him a small note saying how much you love him, take him out on a need. Just give him no more reason to get mad at you.
#48. Smile at him in the sweetest way possible: Your sweetest smile might just be all it takes to take away his anger. He might not even realize he’s smiling back at you already.
#49. Hold him tight: If he’s usually the one to initiate the closeness, it just be might be the perfect time to show him love and your boyfriend might just melt like butter at the gesture.
How To Manage Anger In Marriage
In marriage, two people with different personalities and perspectives come together and live under the same roof. It’s unavoidable to become angry or irritated.
Anger can vary in marriages based on how its expressed by one party and managed by the other.
Screaming at your partner or suppressing your anger due to fear are not healthy ways to deal with anger in marriage, so what do you do? Below are guides on how to manage anger in marriage.
Helpful tips: strengthen your marriage with these tips
#50. Be patient: Anger should not have a place in your marriage. When your partner is angry, try to be patient. When one is spitting fire, the other should be pouring water and not adding fuel to the fire.
#51. Have a forgiving heart: Do not get too angry at your partner. Learn to forgive your partner. We sin against God, we seek forgiveness and He forgives us too.
#52. Address the matter when your partner is calm: Trying to solve the issue when your partner is still hot in anger will only escalate the matter. So instead, address the matter when your partner is calm.
#53. Reconnecting on ways that work for you both: They’re your partner and you should know the closest ways to their hearts. It could be getting intimate or spending quality time together, going on dates, or buying them gifts. Whichever one works for you, channel it to making your partner happy with you again.
How To Control Sudden Bursts Of Anger
Several people get angry easily, even when the slightest things happen. Some don’t think it’s a problem, while some are aware that it needs to stop.
Do you seek a solution to your sudden anger bursts? Do you want to do better when you’re angry?
Below are a few great tips on how to control sudden bursts of anger. 54. Picture yourself calm: Close your eyes and picture yourself calm. See your body relaxed by staying calm and focused.
#55. Think it through: Think about why you’re getting angry all of a sudden, and ask yourself if it’s all worth it. If it’ll all matter the day after. It allows you to shift your focus and keep you calm.
#56. Eat or drink something: If you’re hungry or thirsty, slow down and get something to eat or drink. Channel your energy to that instead of wasting it on getting angry.
#57. Say a prayer: Seek refuge in God from what’s causing you to get angry. Pray to God to help you overcome your anger so you won’t do something you’ll regret, then move on.
Anger Management Therapy Techniques
Chronic and uncontrolled anger can affect your health and can harm your relationship or even career.
If you’ve noticed you’re getting angry constantly, it might be time for you to explore therapy and if you have a friend or family member that has the same issue, you might want to help them with their uncontrollable anger too.
Therapy can help if you’re struggling with anger management and this can be as a result of trauma, unresolved issues that happened over time, or even depression.
The goal of therapy is to help you work through your anger to have a balanced emotion. Below are some anger management therapy techniques.
#59. Psychodynamic therapy: This therapy is often recommended when the anger has consumed you and is affecting the people around you.
This kind of therapy is focused on self-reflection and you may also learn ways to express your anger without affecting your loved ones.
#60. Group therapy: Group therapy is recommended in cases where chronic anger could’ve affected your self-esteem leaving you feeling isolated and guilty.
In group therapy, you tend to feel less alone as others are receiving the treatment too, and it can be helpful to hear about the coping mechanism of others too.
You might need to see a therapist for an individual session because group therapy is often used as a supplement for other kinds of therapy.
#61. Cognitive behavioral therapy: This technique works by helping you identify your triggers and how you usually respond to them.
You learn new ways to respond to anger and your therapist will help you so you can gradually change your thoughts and behaviors to anger and stick with the changes.
#62. Play therapy: This therapy is finely designed for children. The therapist uses creative forms of play to help the children express their thoughts and feelings.
Play therapy helps children to learn how to cope with challenges and helps in the increase of self-esteem. It helps children to navigate their anger and emotions more constructively.
Learning how to control emotions and anger can be a challenge to everyone at times. Even the calmest and composed person would experience periods of anger. It is an emotion that arises in desperate times and can sometimes push you to do the unthinkable. However, if your anger evolves into aggression and becomes more frequent, it might be time for you to address it and resort to ways to control and manage it.
When anger is not addressed whether immediately or takes a while, it may lead to a dangerous scenario or become a destructive force in a relationship and marriage. When emotions are not expressed and validated, anger becomes a severe issue, and problems that need solutions won’t get the attention they deserve.
In a relationship, it’s very natural to feel angry for a reason but it’s also important to learn how to accept and work through it when it happens.
A healthy relationship makes use of excellent coping strategies that keeps anger from becoming destructive, and yours could be one too. Anger rests in the bosom of the unwise which I know you are not.
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